It is true that the friar's decision to marry the two is based on emotion and is, therefore, irrational. His consideration is based on the fact that he wishes to end the strife between the Montague and Capulet households. Also, since it is obvious that he much favours Romeo, he wants to please the young man by doing what he requests. The friar's easy acquiescence to Romeo's appeal verges on the obsequious. It is almost as if the friar believes that he has no choice in the matter. He tells Romeo in Act 2, scene 3:
...But come, young waverer, come, go with me,
In one respect I'll thy assistant be;
For this alliance may so happy prove,
To turn your households' rancour to pure love.
Although the friar thinks that he is doing good in this instance, he has not given thought to the implications of his actions. As a holy man, he would be assisting the two young lovers in doing something that may be deemed immoral. Not consulting their parents, or at least informing them is, for a person of his stature, unwise, impulsive and immature.
He could have also provided the two with more sensible advice, which he does to Romeo later, but at that point, he had already promised to wed the two desperate lovers, a decision he probably believed was irreversible. As it is, he came to regret his actions at the end of the play, for his assistance contributed to the eventual tragedy which befell the two unfortunate lovers.
Later, when he advises Juliet to ingest a potion which would put her in a death-like sleep so that she could avoid marrying Paris because she was already wed to Romeo, and to avoid compromising his own position, he also neglected to use common-sense. The friar seemingly conveniently forgot about the pain and anguish he would cause the Capulets if they should believe that their only daughter had met an untimely end, even worse, that she had committed suicide. This would be the obvious and most likely conclusion. The other would be that she had been overwhelmed by grief over Tybalt's death.
Furthermore, the friar did not think that the best-laid plans could go awry and, therefore, did not allow for back-up if they should. His actions, and the intervention of fate, directly resulted in Romeo's suicide and, thus, Juliet's as well. His good intentions resulted in a terrible and tragic outcome. If he had practiced some aforethought, the ensuing tragedy could have been avoided.
The friar was later shocked when he learnt that his letter, advising Romeo that Juliet was indeed alive, did not reach its destination, as confirmed by the following extract in Act 5, scene 2:
FRIAR LAURENCE
Who bare my letter, then, to Romeo?FRIAR JOHN
I could not send it,--here it is again,--
Nor get a messenger to bring it thee,
So fearful were they of infection.FRIAR LAURENCE
Unhappy fortune! by my brotherhood,
The letter was not nice but full of charge
Of dear import, and the neglecting it
May do much danger. Friar John, go hence;
Get me an iron crow, and bring it straight
Unto my cell.
Unfortunately, his desperate actions at this point were too late and tragedy was the result. When he does arrive at the tomb later, he commits another unbelievably thoughtless act. When he hears a noise he leaves Juliet, who has awakened, alone in the tomb in the presence of her dead lover's and cousin's bodies. Although he urged her to leave, he still left, fearing for his own safety. Surely, he could have done better or was his own security more important?
The friar's intervention in the entire sorry saga was, at best, irresponsible and, at worst, immoral. He does, however, do the right thing at the end of the play in admitting, and taking responsibility for, his culpability. He declares in part, towards the end of the last scene:
...and, if aught in this
Miscarried by my fault, let my old life
Be sacrificed, some hour before his time,
Unto the rigour of severest law.
Sadly, the friar's confession has an exceedingly hollow ring to it, for the damage that had been done could not be undone. The one atonement, though, is that the tragedy united the families in shared grief and they decided to end their feud.
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